How to Cuddle in Bed: The Best Positions for Connection

Sharing a bed with your partner can be one of the simplest joys of a relationship—drifting off together, wrapped in each other’s arms. Yet, for many couples, achieving the perfect cuddle position can be trickier than it sounds, with awkward angles, numb limbs, or overheating often getting in the way.

Our 2024 sleep survey revealed that two-thirds of Brits (65%) share a bed with their partner, yet 27% admit they sleep better when their partner isn’t there. If you can relate and struggle to find a comfortable position together, here are some of the best cuddle positions to inspire your next cosy snooze.

1. Spooning

A timeless favourite. One person acts as the ‘big spoon’, while the other is the ‘little spoon’, creating a cocoon of warmth. Ideal for when you’re winding down.

2. Half spoon

One partner lies on their back while the other lies on their side, embracing them. In this position, the person hugging can rest their head on the partner. It is ideal for couples who prefer sleeping on their back and the other on their side.

3. The lap pillow

This cuddle position is great for when one of you is ready to rest while the other is watching Netflix or reading. One person sits upright while the other places their head in the partner’s lap.

4. Back to back

As the name suggests, this position is where both partners lie on their sides facing away from the other but maintain physical contact.

5. The windmill

An unconventional yet cosy position, the windmill involves both partners lying on their backs from opposite ends of the bed, meeting in the centre with their heads resting on each other’s shoulders. Extend your arms outward like windmill blades for added comfort, and gently cradle your partner’s head with your free hand for a touch of intimacy. This position is ideal for staying close while keeping cool on warmer nights. For more tips on beating the heat, check out our guide on how to cool down at night.

6. Criss-cross

This type of hug lets your partner know you’re there by simply lying beside each other and placing your leg over theirs, offering minimal contact.

7. Two peas in a pod

This cuddle is good for side sleepers. It involves both partners lying on their sides facing each other. Interlock your knees wherever comfortable, and consider holding hands for added intimacy.

8. Spacious hug

It’s fantastic for those who find the above positions too warm. Maintain a hug with arms extended, leaving space between you.

9. Rump rest

One partner lies on their stomach while the other rests their head on their lower back or bottom. This cosy position is excellent for a quick nap or sharing quiet, intimate moments. Discover more about the power of cat naps in our guide.

Now you know the best positions for cuddling, here are some more tips to help you enjoy this special experience:

Communicate your comfort levels

Everyone has different preferences when it comes to touch. Let your partner know if you’re too warm, squished, or want to try a different position.

Embrace the power of touch

Light touches or gentle strokes on the back, arm, or face can make cuddling even more soothing.

Adjust for sleep

While cuddling is a wonderful way to connect, sleeping while cuddled can sometimes be uncomfortable. Once you’re ready to sleep, feel free to shift into positions that allow for proper rest.

Try cuddling with purpose

Set aside intentional time for cuddling. Whether before bed or during a lazy afternoon, prioritising these moments helps nurture your bond.

Let’s delve into the three main benefits of mastering the art of cuddling:

1. Improves your relationship

Cuddling releases a hormone in the body called oxytocin. This hormone is comforting in every sense of the word and has been dubbed the ‘love hormone’ by scientists.

Oxytocin is mostly responsible for reproductive activities such as inducing labour and stimulating milk production in pregnant women. However, its other responsibility is promoting social interaction and bonding with your romantic partner.

According to research conducted by psychology professor Ruth Feldman at Bar-Ilan University in Israel, the longer a relationship lasts, the more oxytocin is produced. Her team measured the levels of oxytocin present in couples. She and her colleagues found that new lovers had double the amount of oxytocin that is usually seen in pregnant women.

Reporting on the study, Scientific American said that:

‘Couples with the highest levels were the ones still together six months later. They were also more attuned to each other than the low-oxytocin couples when Feldman asked them to talk about a shared positive experience.’

2. Reduces stress, blood pressure, and risk of heart disease

In addition to boosting love and promoting bonding within your relationship, oxytocin also reduces stress and blood pressure. Stress management coach and holistic therapist Catherine A. Connors says that while cuddling, ‘the chemical reaction can help to reduce blood pressure, which in turn reduces the risk of heart disease, but it can also help to reduce stress and anxiety.’

If oxytocin alone isn’t enough, cuddling also releases the ‘happy hormone’ serotonin. Together, these hormones are a match made in heaven for your immune system.

A study from Carnegie Mellon University tested the effects of hugging against the common cold. It found that individuals who regularly engaged in cuddling were less likely to contract the illness and those who did fall ill reported less severe symptoms.

So, the next time you have a cold, give a loved one a big, long cuddle to help ease the discomfort.

3. Makes it easier to fall asleep

The wonder-hormone oxytocin also induces sleep, so there is no better place to cuddle than in bed. Scientists believe this happens because it suppresses the effects of cortisol, the ‘stress hormone’. It calms the body and helps us feel relaxed.

This calming effect, combined with the comfort of your bed and the warmth of your partner’s arms being wrapped around you, creates the ideal conditions for the perfect night’s sleep.

For more tips on improving your sleep quality, take a look at our article on how to sleep better at night.

Not everyone enjoys falling asleep in their partner’s arms. Our 2024 sleep survey revealed the top reasons why Brits sometimes find sharing a bed bothersome:

• Their partner’s snoring (51%)
• It feels too hot (27%)
• Too much fidgeting (28%)

If any of these sound familiar, it might be time to try cuddling. Beyond being cosy, it’s a simple yet powerful way to foster intimacy and improve sleep quality. Next time you’re under the covers, try one of these comforting positions to enjoy the benefits of connecting with your partner.